Iraq, just wondering how you would handle it and how you would treat you child if they told you they were gay and if they brought home a boy/girl friend?
Already been there and done that - not that exactly, but a similar scenario where the will of the Lord got gobsmacked in the face. I would not handle it much differently than I did in that scenario, other than I would ratchet the emotion back about 5,000%......
Quite simple - I would let them know (hopefully without too much drama - and once their "good buddy" was gone), that they are out of line and not in harmony with God's will. I would also let them know the path back to a repentant life. Simple - the way a Bishop would handle it; but maybe with a teche more emotion since it would be a whole lot more personal.
D&C 19 would probably be read and a few other things.
I think this way - you do not "know that you are gay" unless you act out on it. Also, a "boyfriend" or "girlfriend" in today's vernacular implies that sex is involved. "Dating" is now code for an ongoing sexual relationship (at least outside the Lord's house - among my friends outside of Church). I was shocked as a youth leader to be dragged into a meeting in the Stake Center where all of the 14-18 year olds were told by our Stake President that oral sex is sex. This back in 2003 or 2004 (after that piece of shiz, Clinton had dragged the whole nation into the gutter.....) Translation to me? And what was passed on to me when asked about why this was even necessary?? I was told that, at the time, that 70% of the kids in that meeting (statistically speaking) had already gone there. Holy moly!! Kind of stripped my rose colored glasses right off - I was shocked. I mean, there were some kids I would have possible suspected as having been sexually active, some involved in WoW issues - but on that scale by the time they reached their Senior year in HS? Shocking.
So, the first thing I would do is call them to repentance.
Now, I want to turn the question back on the asker. What do you think you would do if you were that kid who was heading over to dad's place to out him/herself with his/her lover (sorry, I about gag here at the idea of at least guy on guy stuff - just repulsive to me) and there was a head-on collision on the freeway; both gay people killed - and sent back to their Maker. Not the "advocate" here, but their Maker. TWO COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PEOPLE AND ATTITUDES TOWARDS THE CHILDREN, SCRIPTURALLY SPEAKING; ONE SUCCORING (UNDERSTANDING AT LEAST THE TENDENCIES AND) THE NEEDS OF HIS WAYWARD SIBLINGS, THE OTHER NOT BEING ABLE LOOK UPON SIN WITH THE LEAST DEGREE OF ALLOWANCE. ONE A GATE KEEPER, THE OTHER ONE WHO WOULD VOUCH FOR AND PLEAD THE CAUSE FOR THE WAYWARD ONE - POSSIBLY EVEN CARRYING THE SIN OF THAT INDIVIDUAL UNTIL THEY WERE ABLE TO COMPLETELY OVERCOME IT. Two different people, two different roles; PERIOD (and yes, I go round and round and round some more with people over this - though the scriptures are replete with examples to make my point).
Two different roles, one in purpose and one in heart - which is: to save as many children as is possible, while not polluting and demeaning what is good, holy and right and that has been held inviolate from an existing eternity (because the filter was set fine enough) and into the next eternity. God has to keep even His own creations out (that He loves or has loved dearly) in order to not despoil the experience for those who choose to be obedient. All the while, conserving Agency perfectly. If He did not keep those basic parameters, He would cease to be God. I will say this now (and hold the hate mail, please), but men are more suited to be the gate keepers than women are. Men hold the line (keeping even those they love at a distance) until they maintain the value set, while the women (as nurturers) might be prone to bend on that detail out of love. A man would shoot one of his own (errant) offspring in a heartbeat (if compelled to) to save the rest of the offspring from imminent death at the hands of the errant one. A woman (mother of an errant offspring), might well flinch and lose the whole bunch for lack of focus as the giver of life. A woman might not be the best in the trenches of war - it is illogical for a truly compassionate and loving woman to gun down the offspring of another woman (whom she knows went through the same process to bring that life into the world). For a man, it simply is a calculated risk. Taken to an extreme, this same process may explain why there are more pathological male mass murderers (not including the whole abortion thing here), than there are in the female population.
Different roles, different brain chemistry, different outcomes. Simple biology. That is my observation.
So, yeah. I would tell them to repent - hopefully in a calm and loving manner..... :) In a perfect world. If they truly had feelings of attraction toward the member of the same gender, I would tell them to resist that and not give in and remind them that I am human, and that I have had feelings of attraction (intense attraction, at times) towards other females (yes, I am open about that with my wife and she with me in the same manner - we really do not have one of those possessive, clingy, insecure and even pathological relationships where the other cannot know about old girl/boyfriends, or male/female friends at work, church, etc). But never once would I ever act on it - I would rather be dead than betray myself and my wife and my God in that manner. Especially as I get older and the old hormones are ramping down (thank you, Jesus....) - who has time or drive for that kind of stuff?? Especially those former LDS 69 year old cougars/players out there - grow up and get control of yourself. You are no longer a teenager..... Sheesh........
If that were ever going to happen, it would have been so "twenties" when the hormones were a ragin'..... I once had a killer job right out of college in pharmaceutical research and development (hormone therapy tech) and I shared an office with a gorgeous brunette (model potential, except she had crooked teeth - and I told her all of that.... no pulling punches) who was half Italian, half Mexican. Her name was Malinda Horne - which I translated roughly, as "Bad/Beautiful/Horny" based on a few things she shared with the group. She had a regular stream of male visitors into the office hitting on her - it was almost laughable. Our office had blinds on them on the door and the windows looking out into the rest of the facility - and I specifically asked if we could make sure to keep the blinds open at all times and the door open, unless we had to consult on a team member (we were both leads). At one point, when we were sharing our respective marital woes (kind of a no-no, at least face to face; and even online.....), I told her that I felt attraction towards her - and that I thought it best that we have a safety valve if we had to work together. Honesty is always the best policy. I simply say it how it is. People usually know exactly where they stand with me - although someone who holds some kind of position of power over me, I will mute that until it is no longer tenable..... Then I let er rip. Been there, done that as well....
So yeah, if I could tamp down any feelings towards a co-worker or whatever - because I was keeping it in the bounds the Lord set, why could a regular striving person who felt an attraction toward a same-gender person not do it? Simple. Logical. End of story - go talk to the Bishop. Repent. Easy. Logic rocks, baby!
I will make a great god one day - black and white, baby! Leave the rest of the equation to a more compassionate offspring..... I think the Father must have been an engineer or along those lines. I just can't see anything else considering what I have read in scripture and according to what I have seen coming from Hubble. At least, that is how it appears to me.....
Hope that put any questions to bed on the matter. To bed - with one man and one woman - and after marriage. THAT bed.... lol
To finish the piece off, I will say this; you calling them out will most likely just make them angry and you will have a strained relationship aferwards. BUT - over time, they will thank you for telling them the hard thing, the difficult thing at a time when it would have been easier to cave and tell that that "there is no sin in that thing". If you really love someone, you give them the nasty tasting cold medicine, you makes them earn their wheels, you make them walk home when they forget to put gas in the car. One day, they will love you for not turning them into pot headed, self-loathing human beings because you coddled them.